Question: Dear Sayadaw, I am the only son in a family of four siblings. My parents, like many other families, have the ideology of respecting men and despising women and they are very attached to the children in the family. I myself also have attachments to my parents in the direction of resisting imposition and expectations of parents and children. I have also practiced renunciation of attachment to my parents and I still feel like I still have resistance towards them. Can you please tell me how to completely let go of this attachment?

This is concerned with anyone. Even the son is sure to expect a lot from someone. Thats why he was expected a lot by his parents. This is cause and effect of ever new impermanent nature. Ever new impermanent nature is concerned with any living beings. We get what we give. If he gets expectation from his parents, he is sure to expect a lot from someone in the past. He got what he has done before and what he is doing now. With this right understanding, we should stop whatever we do.

Each of our physical verbal and mental actions should be stopped to detach, to be doing or not doing only without grasping or attaching in the mind. He may not understand like this. Even if he understands like this, he may not be able to practice like this, thats why he feel angry to his parents. If he knows the truth like this, he may forgive and forget to his parents.

Besides, he needs to use the expectation of the others in the right way. For me, when I practice meditation I was 30 years old. Most of the meditators in the country are old and not much healthy. Thats why I was expected a lot from the senior meditators. They rely on me, expect a lot from me. Thats why I have the chance to try hard for my practice, not only for myself but also for the meditation teacher. Now after 23 years later, more and more meditators, juniors and seniors and also meditation masters, and senior monks are also relying on me, supporting me to he able to do more and more good deeds, to be long life, to be free from all kinds of danger. We just need to be able to use whatever good or bad experience to be using only, to do all kinds of good deeds without grasping and attaching in the mind. In this way, we will be able to represent to the others, to all, and to Buddha Dharma Sangha.